Behind “The In-Between” with Deanna Davies

1. What first called you to write The In-Between, and why did it feel important to share this story now?

I started writing because I needed somewhere to place what I was living through.

There was so much happening at once. Caregiving, loss, change, uncertainty, and the quiet unraveling of things I thought I understood. At first, I did not think I was writing a book. I was trying to stay present. I was trying to make sense of what my body, my heart, and my life were asking me to notice.

Over time, I began to realize this was not only my story. I would sit in hospital waiting rooms and meet people who had that same look. The look of waiting, worrying, holding, not knowing. We may not have known each other’s full stories, but there was a quiet recognition between us.

So many people are living in some in-between. Between what was and what comes next. Between control and surrender. Between holding it together and quietly falling apart.

I felt nervous about sharing it because it is deeply personal, but I also felt that if it helped even one person feel less alone in their own season of uncertainty, it needed to be shared.

2. This book was written from inside a year of caregiving, change, and uncertainty. What did writing allow you to notice that you may not have seen otherwise?

Writing helped me slow down enough to notice what I was actually carrying.

When you are in the middle of caregiving, grief, work, responsibility, and change, you often just keep moving. You do what needs to be done. You respond. You manage. You stay strong because people are depending on you.

But writing and reflecting gave me a place to pause.

And when writing felt like too much, audio recording became another way of staying with the moment. Sometimes I would speak the words before I could write them. That helped me capture the emotion before I edited it, explained it, or made it more acceptable.

It helped me notice the small signals. The fatigue. The tightness. The moments where I was overriding myself. The places where my body was speaking long before my mind was ready to understand.

3. You describe this as embodied leadership from within. What does that mean to you, and how did your body become part of the story?

For many years, I understood leadership through the mind. Strategy, communication, emotional intelligence, decisions, relationships, and responsibility.

But this year taught me that leadership also lives in the body.

It lives in how we breathe before we respond. How do we notice when we are overwhelmed? How do we recognize the difference between urgency and importance? How do we stay present when we cannot control the outcome?

My body became part of the story because it would not let me keep pretending I was fine. It began to signal what I had been managing, minimizing, or pushing through.

That changed my understanding of leadership. I no longer see it only as what we do for others. I see it as how we stay connected to ourselves while carrying responsibility, change, uncertainty, and care.

4. What do you hope readers feel, recognize, or permit themselves to explore after reading this book?

I hope readers feel less alone.

I hope they recognize the places in their own lives where they have been holding so much, perhaps without naming it. I hope they begin to listen more gently to themselves, especially in times when they feel pressure to keep going, stay strong, or have everything figured out.

This book does not offer a perfect ending or a set of simple answers. That was never my intention.

I hope that it permits people to pause. To notice. To honour what their body and heart may already know. To understand that being

in-between does not mean they are lost. Sometimes it means something deeper is being revealed.

5. Where does The In-Between go from here, both as a book and as part of your larger work in leadership, reflection, and well-being?

I feel like The In-Between is only the beginning of a larger conversation.

The book began as a personal story, but it has opened a wider reflection on leadership, change, caregiving, uncertainty, and the human experience of holding responsibility when life does not offer clear answers.

I see it becoming part of my speaking, workshops, retreats, and leadership work through Elevate3.

I am especially interested in exploring what this means for leaders, project managers, educators, caregivers, and teams who are navigating change in real time.

So much of leadership focuses on action, outcomes, and moving forward. I want to create space for the quieter parts too. The pause. The body’s wisdom. The uncertainty. The grief. The growth that happens before we have language for it.

Where it goes from here is still unfolding, but I know it will continue to centre reflection, embodiment, leadership, and the courage to stay present in the in-between.

6. Why did you include the “In-Between Notes” throughout the book?

I included the “In-Between Pages” because they are something I have always wished for when reading reflective books.

There are moments when a sentence lands, or a question opens something, and I want a place to pause with it. Not just read past it, but sit with it for a moment.

The “In-Between Pages” were created for that reason. They invite the reader to slow down, notice what is coming up for them, and make the book their own in some way.

For me, reflection is part of the experience. This book was never meant to be rushed through. It was meant to be held, returned to, marked up, and lived with.

Those pages create space for the reader’s own story to rise alongside mine.

What readers are saying.

A beautifully crafted guide to navigating loss with grace. The brilliant transition from journal entries to 'moments of pause' resonated with me profoundly, and the personal photos add such a touching, thoughtful layer to the book. I was especially moved by the letter of appreciation to the Providence caregiving team. Beyond the beautiful prose, the restorative practices offered are wonderful, practical tools that I am already implementing in my own home. Highly recommended!
Tami Traynor